Making lists...

I thought waiting for our referral was hard. This waiting for a court date just plain stinks.

I have memorized all 30 pictures of Tate. I am haunted by the timeline on the side of my blog that shows Tate getting older everyday that goes by. He is 6 and 1/2 months already!

When I really start thinking about it, I get sick to my stomach. I emailed my blogger friend Joanna today and told her I feel like I am a bad mom. That I have abandoned my baby. I logically know that there is no way I could get to him any sooner, but in a way I feel like I have let him down in some way. I just wish I would wake up in the morning and he was here.

So I have tried not checking blogs as much and not searching baby times on the computer. I have tried not looking at his pictures a million times a day. I thought maybe it would help.

I didn't.

So what do I do when I am a anxious. waiting mess?

I make lists.

Lots of lists.

So many in fact, that I have made a list of lists I have started.

1. Thinks to do around the house

2. Registry items

3. Top diaper bags

4. Things to do in the nursery

5. Books to read
6. Pages to include in Tate's Adoption Journey book

7. Books to add to Tate's library

8. Activities to do when Tate gets here

9. Favorite Etsy baby items

10. Travel items

If you think of anything I missed, let me know. I take suggestions!:)

P.S.- I just reread this post before I posted. I'm not a complete hopeless mess. Life is good. God is great.

It is all about the journey!:)

So, what's next?

I have been meaning to update for awhile but every time I sit down to the computer, I am just not sure where to go. We are so in love with our little man. So much so it hurts. I find myself looking at his pictures and just cracking up at his beautiful smile and wonderful curls.

Other times, I want to burst out in tears! It just kills me to think that he is half a world away. He is growing so quickly and we are missing it! I think the hardest thing is is that we love him so much, and he doesn't even know who we are!

But if there is one thing that God has taught us through this whole process is that his timing is perfect and we trust that it will be!

We did get some wonderful pictures today sent from the Bottomly's who just arrived home with their adorable Olive! We needed to see his face today.

So for those of you wondering, what we are waiting on now is a court date. Usually this take about 2-3 months. The catch for us is that in Ethiopia there is a rainy season where the courts close for about 6-8 weeks sometime in August through October. So if we do not make the deadline, it looks like we won't travel for our court date until Oct. or Nov.

So now we wait.

I still have lots of thinks that I never want to forget about our referral week, so stay tuned for those posts!

Happy Father's Day!

Happy Father's Day to two of the best Dad's in the World!

We are so thankful for the Godly examples you have been!

We love you!

And to the Father-to-be, I can't wait to see you in action!

You are going to be one great daddy!

Blog face lift

So with all this new excitement in our lives, I figured it was time for a new look for our blog. Becky over at digital design does an AWESOME job and and is super affordable! She created Lindsey and Julie's new blog looks, which is where I got her info! And to make things even better, she is using her skills to raise money for their next Ethiopian adoption!

Go check her out!

Feeling the love...

I really can not believe that it has almost been two weeks since we have revieved "the call".

In some ways it feels like it was yesterday.

In other ways, his face feels like home. Like we have known in all out lives.

I don't ever want to forget that day and I want Tate to know how special it was. Not only for us, but so many people who have been praying and waiting with us.

After we received the call and Brian and I had some time to process it all, we could not wait for our family to see his face! We invited everyone up to "unveil" Baby Tate. I proboblay made it a little dramatic but give me a break! I have been waiting for this day for 8 months! :)

Unfortunately, my dad out of town and could not make it. So we decided to e-mail him and my mom the pictures at the same time. I had this vision of them both receiving the email at the same time and opening to see their first grandchild's face. Well, we were having some email trouble because the file was so big. We spent about 15 minutes trying to get it right. Finally my dad received the e-mail and opened it. So he begins gushing over all the pics while my mom my mom is about to cry listening to him because she can't open hers. It was quit anti-climactic and stressful but pretty funny!

The rest of the family came up to meet their newest grandson, nephew, and cousin.

The girls anxiously waiting for everyone to arrive

After the slide show (yes, I made a slide show:)), we had pictures printed off and passed them around.

Funny thing, Walgreen's made a mistake and accidentally printed off 998 8x10's . The stack was HUGE. Too bad they were only going to discount the extra prints $0.50 each.

I am sure that everyone we know wants an 8X10 of Tate in their living room...right?:)

Our call occurred on a Wednesday and we were fortunate enough to have some of our friends from church come over after class to see our little guys. I can not tell you how great it is to have such a supportive church family! We really love these guys and are so thankful Tate will have them to spoil him!

It was really hard to go back to work the next day. But I could not wait to share the pictures with my wonderful co-workers. I arrived to find my office all decked out! It was so great!


Between the visits, text messages, blog comments, facebook messages and calls, we felt so blessed and loved! Thank you all!


Tate- I want you to know how much you are wanted and loved.
Not only by your mom and dad. So many people are praying for you and anticipating your arrival. I think we have enough babysitting offers to get you through college. :)
June 16th 2010 will forever be a special day for us.
We are so thankful so many got to share it with us!
You are one loved little guy!

Here's how it went down....

So you know how they say that the day that you least expect it, it comes?

Well that is exactly what happened folks.

I will be honest, everyday for the past week, I thought the call would be that day. So everyday, from 9 to 3, I sat on my phone. I checked blogs every time I sat down at my desk. I felt like butterflies were all over my stomach.

But not today!

I woke up this morning and just knew that today would NOT be the day. And I was ok with it!

I was seeing a patient for a new OB intake. I had left my phone in my office because, like I said, I just wasn't thinking about it today. I am almost done with my patient, when the receptionist knocks on the door.

"Your husband just called and said you need to call him back NOW!"

Me: "Are you serious?!?!?"

I then just leave the patient in the room! I kinda wondering what they were thinking!!:)

I then call Brian back and he tells me that Mary had tried to call me, but I didn't answer and that this was it!! I hung up the phone and flew out the door!

I spent the next 30 minutes of my drive home smiling, screaming and crying!

W got home and waited for Mary to call us back. She had a meeting, so we had to wait for about an hour. During that time, I changed clothes 3 times, did dishes, swept the whole house, and scared our dog about a million times with my screams!

Our last picture together before we see our son!

I was supper excited!!!

Please ignore my crazy bending thumbs. Weird, right?!?!:))

Brian is excited!

I can't even explain to you the feelings we felt when we saw him.

We knew he was ours! Remember those crazy vivid dreams I have been having? Well, I saw his hair in my dreams. Soft, beautiful curls.

PERFECTION!

He is a 5 and 1/2 month old ball of joy! Mary repeatedly commented on how he was such a happy and smiley baby! She told us that he smiles with his eyes, and does he ever!

Our friends, the Carter's, got to meet him last week and Kellie told me that we has such a happy baby! She sent me some video and pictures and I can not tell you how much joy it gave me to see them loving on him.

It was such an emotional call. We were so excited to see his face, but there was the part that was extremely sad for his past as well. Even though they told you to be prepared for this, I really just wasn't .

We have chosen the name Tate for our little man.

Tate means, "cheerful", and we thought it was fitting.

I so wish you could see his face, his eyes, his smile.

We are so in love!

God is so faithful and we feel blessed beyond belief!

Our first family pic!

(Sorry, we can't post his actual picture until we pass court!)

What a great day! To top it off. Joanna got their referral today too!

I just knew we would get our news on the same day!:)

For all those waiting, your time will come, and it will be amazing!

REFERRAL!!!!!!!!

We just got the call!

We are over the moon!

I think my dog thinks I'm crazy because I can't stop screaming!:)

Waiting for Brain to get home so we can see our baby!

More info to come!!!!!:)

A girl can dream, right?

Still no call.

I did get some prints I ordered off etsy for the nursery today!

Aren't they cute!?!?!?

Maybe they will be good luck!

I am doing an awful lot of dreaming these days.

The past 3 nights, I have had very vivid dreams of our son.

I can see him.

I can feel him.

But the dreaming doesn't stop there.

Every morning, I dream about what it will look like if we get the call that day.

I dream about Mary calling me.

I dream about calling Brian and giving him the news.

I dream about calling our families.

I dream about seeing his face.

It is pure happiness.

Dreaming is nice, but the real thing would be even better.

So, one more day down and one more day closer to Baby P!

Welcome Home Elliott!!

Last night we got to go to the airport to welcome home Baby Elliott! What a precious little boy and such a beautiful family! We are so thankful that the Carter's are friends and can rely on them for tips when we travel! We are so excited that our boys will get to grow up together!

Welcome Home Elliott!!!

Here we go again!

So it is time to start another week.

Another week of waiting.

I really hope this week is not as bad as last week. I THINK I have convinced myself that it is too early to be this anxious and it will probably still be a couple of weeks. I mean, I should at least wait until we are #1!

But just in case....

Camera and computer are ready.

My phone is "practicing" for the call! :)

So, do you think if I stare at my phone long enough it will ring?!?!

Just kidding......kind of.

Trying to convince myself...

I woke up this morning with the feeling that we were not going to get our referral today.

It just doesn't feel like the day.

It doesn't even really feel like the week.

Maybe this will keep me from stalking the F.B.I. list.

Maybe this will keep me from checking my phone every hour.

Maybe this will get those dang butterflies out of my stomach.

Maybe this is my attempted to trick "the call" into actually coming today! :)

The part that is the hardest is knowing that our son is probably already in a Gladney care center.

They are probably just trying to get paperwork worked out. So there he sits, half a world away, waiting. And here we sit, waiting too. Every day that goes by feels like I am missing another precious day of our life together.

Then come the fears.

Is there anyway we can still get through court before rainy season?!?! If not, that means just WAITING another 6 weeks for the courts to reopen. BUMMER!

I know that one day, I will read these post and laugh to myself about how impatient I was.

That when he is here, none of this will really matter.

But right now, this stinks!

Hoping that this day brings some good news to Joanna (#1 on the list)!

Here I am....

Two important points I need to make.

1.We have been on the list for a little over 8 months!

2. I have officially hit "crazy" mode.

I actually thought that I was going to skip this stage of the wait.

The part where you begin checking your phone repeatedly.

The part where you wake up every morning wondering if it is going to be "the" day.

But here I am.

Having dreams about the referral call and seeing his face.

Having a small anxiety attack every time my phone rings during the day.

Making sure the house is clean enough for our "referral party".

Looking at my patient schedule everyday and planning out what to do in case I have to cancel appointments.

Seeing everything as a "sign" that the call is coming soon.

My stomach feels like butterflies are just living there.

Everyday around 4, I count the day as a loss.

Every night, I hope it will come tomorrow.

I am sick of "crazy" mode.

I am ready for baby mode.

6 years

Six years ago today, I married my best friend.

It was such a fun and memorable day!

Actually the past 11 years have been that way! My Senior Prom, 2001High School Graduation-2001Engagement pictures- 2004Wedding- 06-05-2004Church Pictures- 2005Thanksgiving-2006Christmas- 20072010


I am so thankful that I get to share my life with this man and I am so excited to start the next chapter of our life, "parenthood", together!