Monday, June 28, 2010

Making lists...

I thought waiting for our referral was hard. This waiting for a court date just plain stinks.
I have memorized all 30 pictures of Tate. I am haunted by the timeline on the side of my blog that shows Tate getting older everyday that goes by. He is 6 and 1/2 months already!
When I really start thinking about it, I get sick to my stomach. I emailed my blogger friend Joanna today and told her I feel like I am a bad mom. That I have abandoned my baby. I logically know that there is no way I could get to him any sooner, but in a way I feel like I have let him down in some way. I just wish I would wake up in the morning and he was here.
So I have tried not checking blogs as much and not searching baby times on the computer. I have tried not looking at his pictures a million times a day. I thought maybe it would help.
I didn't.
So what do I do when I am a anxious. waiting mess?
I make lists.
Lots of lists.

So many in fact, that I have made a list of lists I have started.

1. Thinks to do around the house
2. Registry items
3. Top diaper bags
4. Things to do in the nursery
5. Books to read
6. Pages to include in Tate's Adoption Journey book
7. Books to add to Tate's library
8. Activities to do when Tate gets here
9. Favorite Etsy baby items
10. Travel items

If you think of anything I missed, let me know. I take suggestions!:)
P.S.- I just reread this post before I posted. I'm not a complete hopeless mess. Life is good. God is great.
It is all about the journey!:)


Amber said...

I'm a terrible list maker, so after thinking as hard as I could for suggestions- I just don't have any. :) But I LOVE that you have a list of your lists. That's awesome.

And whatever keeps you busy... I'm starting to feel like my baby isn't ever going to come either. We both know it's going to happen, but the end is so much harder to wait through!!!

Becky said...

Finding joy in the journey is how I try to live life too.

heather said...

i am so nervous of this feeling after we know who our little baby is....i could cry just thinking of it! your idea of making lists sounds great to me. just gotta keep on keepin' on and soon you will be on your way! hang in there girl. xoxo

Toni said...

Ok, at least I'm not the only one to make many lists! We leave in 3 days for our trip to ET and I am still making lists. In fact, if you got any good travel idea on your list please share! This is such a crazy but fun time!!! I would love to meet your little on while we are there.

Christine said...

funny. we both posted about lists. I think most of us adopting mommy's do the list thing...