Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Here I am....

Two important points I need to make.

1.We have been on the list for a little over 8 months!
2. I have officially hit "crazy" mode.

I actually thought that I was going to skip this stage of the wait.
The part where you begin checking your phone repeatedly.
The part where you wake up every morning wondering if it is going to be "the" day.

But here I am.

Having dreams about the referral call and seeing his face.
Having a small anxiety attack every time my phone rings during the day.
Making sure the house is clean enough for our "referral party".
Looking at my patient schedule everyday and planning out what to do in case I have to cancel appointments.
Seeing everything as a "sign" that the call is coming soon.

My stomach feels like butterflies are just living there.

Everyday around 4, I count the day as a loss.
Every night, I hope it will come tomorrow.
I am sick of "crazy" mode.
I am ready for baby mode.


Laura said...

I feel the same way!!! Your referral will be soon.

jamullins said...

Oh I sooooo remember those days...jumping everytime the phone rings, not being able to fall asleep thinking "the call" might come tomorrow...I will be praying for peace for you! I hope that next time we see you guys you will have some good news to share!!!

Amber said...

It's so hard to wait patiently for something so important! Especially when the timeline is so up in the air. I hope your crazy mode ends soon and you get the one phone call you are waiting for. :)

Joanna said...

Just for fun (or to be more crazy) - what time do you think "the call" will come? I, too, count 4:00 pm as a loss for the day. But, I feel like if it hasn't come at 1:30 (exactly at 1:30, in my crazy mind) then it most likely won't come. My hubby's "time" is 11:30. [This is all central time.]

Niemitz said...

I too am in official crazy mode!!!!
My phone was ringing the other day while I was on the airport shuttle bus from a Texas number....I literally got sick to my stomach, thinking it could be The Call. It turned out to be Southwest telling me my flight was delayed:( I can only imagine whats going to happen if it was Gladney!!!!
Hoping June is the month:)


Shannon Plumb said...

I would say my "time" is also around 1:30. After that, I don't check my phone as much and the hope kinda dies.:( I really didn't realized I even did that until you mentioned it!

Becky said...

Take deep breaths and focus that energy into prayer! You God will get through this phase...and every successive phase to come.

The Busters said...

The crazy mode is so hard!! But I think it must be totally normal or else we are all abnormal together. :) My hope also died at 4pm. My call came at 1:30pm EST by the way (in case you are polling people because I did!). But I know I talked to people ahead of me that got their call around 3pm EST. You are close!!! hugs!!!

Tam and Kai - NYC said...

Our call came at 4:30pm EST. I also thought it was a loss after 4pm and almost let it go to voicemail because I was yapping on the other line.
It's coming. It really is!

Heather said...

Hang in there! I hit crazy mode and the phone rang a few days later with our referral... crazy is a sign you are close! ;-)